SWNOVELS When He Desires: Chapter 6
Here’s the thing with getting cheated on—it doesn’t just hurt, it pulls the rug out from under you. You start questioning your judgment. Wondering if you can ever really know a person. Suddenly seeing all the signs you missed.
Obvious signs, signs that a smart person would have surely picked up on.
But not you. Because you’re a damn idiot. And everyone knows it.
Given my family history, you’d think I’d have seen the signs of a liar from a mile away. My deadbeat dad lied every time he said he’d see me on my birthday. My mom lied when she said the doctors told her everything was fine. My brother lied when he said he’d only go to California for a year.
Naively, I thought Brett was different.
Pushing a wisp of hair out of my face, I glance around. We open for lunch in half an hour, so the dining room of Frostbite Tavern is empty now. I wet a sponge and crouch down to clean a spill on the floor that Melissa should have taken care of last night at the end of her shift.
When Brett asked me out three years ago, I couldn’t believe it. He was the town’s golden boy, the son of our mayor, and he was interested in me? I should have known the entire thing was doomed from the start.
Men like Brett don’t end up with girls like me.
My mom was born in a nearby trailer park and had me and my brother with a biker gang enforcer. A criminal.
My father never came to any of my recitals or graduations. His idea of quality time was bringing Maxton and me to the annual rally hosted at a nearby campsite by their gang, and leaving us in the care of strange women who smelled like cigarette smoke and bad decisions. The morning after, he’d drop us off at school in dirty, dusty clothes, and the looks I got made me pray the earth would just open up and swallow me whole.
I never felt like I belonged in this town. Growing up, I thought if I just tried hard enough, I could change that. If I got straight As, if I was never late for anything, if I was always flawlessly nice, maybe then the townspeople would see me as more than just white trash.
Brett choosing me felt like the universe had finally granted me my wish. It was so tempting to believe we could have a future together that I let myself be sucked into a fantasy.
The night I walked in on Brett cheating on me, I cried myself to sleep, and when I woke up in the morning, eyes puffy and chest aching, I decided I was done.
Done trusting people. Done putting myself last. Done with this town.
I would never be accepted here.
In a perfect world, I’d go no contact with my ex, but I can’t do that while I’m still in Darkwater Hollow for a long list of reasons. The most important one being—
“Hey, B. Mel said the Sam Adams keg ran out at the end of her shift last night. Might wanna get a new one in before the lunchtime rush.”
Brett comes around the bar, his leather boots appearing in my periphery. I shoot him a glance from where I’m squatting on the floor. Yes, my cheating ex is also my boss. The owner of Frostbite Tavern. Trying to find another job in Darkwater Hollow is hopeless. There are only a handful of other places in town that would hire me, and the only reason they would is if one of their servers died. As far as I know, they’re all in good health.
Which is why my number one priority at the moment is selling my house so that I can get the hell out of this town.
“No problem.” Changing empty kegs is also something Melissa should have done before clocking out for the night, but I’d rather keep my interactions with Brett to a minimum, so I let it slide.
Just when I’m hoping he’ll wander back to his office, he leans against the counter and crosses his arms over his chest, settling in for a conversation I have no interest in having. “Hey, you all right?”
I rub at the dried liquor on the ground. “Fine.”
“You sure? You look tired, B.”
I finish with the spill and stand up. “I’m good.”
He rubs his palm over his cleanly shaved jaw. The concern in his expression is so convincing, I almost believe it.
“I worry about you.” He points at my face. “You’ve got bags under your eyes, and you look like you haven’t slept in days. You need to take better care of yourself.”
“I said I’m fine, Brett.”
He raises his palms in the air. “I’m just worried.”
“No need to be.”
Reaching into his back pocket, he pulls out a small flat box. “I got this for you. For your birthday.”
I blink. My birthday?
God, that’s today. I’m twenty-three.
I can’t believe I forgot. Somewhere between grieving my mom, gluing my heart back together, and now trying to sell the house, it slipped my mind.
Brett gives the box a shake. “Take it.”
He’s going to keep me here until I do.
I grab it from him and pop open the lid.
It’s a silver heart-shaped pendant.
Irritation licks up my spine. “What is this?”
“A pendant.”
“No, I mean what is this, Brett? We broke up, remember?”
He sighs, like I’m the one being unreasonable. “Blake, don’t be like this. It’s been like four months since… Well, you know. Don’t you think it’s time for us to move past it?”
Brett has this annoying habit of minimizing what happened. If you listen to him, you’d think I’m holding something inconsequential over his head, like not taking the garbage out one night.
“Let me remind you,” I grind out. “You cheated on me. Right here in this bar. In your office. With Melissa.”
I liked Melissa. Sure, she’s a bit flighty and harebrained, but she’d always been nice to me. We’d worked together for two years, and I thought she was someone I could trust.
Clearly, my judgment of people’s character is seriously impaired.
Just thinking about how the two of them played me for a fool sends a hot wave of rage through me.
Something resembling a pout appears on his face. “I miss you.”
I stare at him blankly. Did he hear anything I just said?
When I stay silent, he changes tactics. He rakes his fingers through his flowing, thoroughly conditioned blond hair, and says, “All day and night, I think about you. About how I’d screwed up.”
Does he really? I doubt it.
What was he thinking about when he was having sex with Melissa? It sure as hell wasn’t me. I walked in on them two months after my mom died. He knew exactly how much I was struggling with grief, and he obviously didn’t care enough about me to keep his dick in his pants.
What he did is unforgivable. He lost my trust, and I don’t hand out second chances.
I snap the jewelry box closed and hand it back to him. He shakes his head, refusing to take it, so I place it on the counter. There’s no way I’m taking it home.
“I’ve got things to do before we open.”
When I move to brush past him, he grabs me by the forearm.
“C’mon. You’ve punished me enough.” His eyes are a perfect shade of baby blue. I used to love those eyes. I’d look inside them and see our future together, all painted in vivid color.
Now all I see is his guilty expression when I caught him with his pants down and Melissa’s legs wrapped around his waist.
“Brett, I’m not punishing you. I’m just done with you.”
This makes his eyes darken the way they always used to whenever I talked about opening my own bookstore one day. It’s like I wasn’t allowed to dream. He wanted me to act like all of my dreams had already come true because I was with him.
That should have pissed me off way more than it had while we were together.
“We’re over.” My voice is steady, but my heart is pounding hard. With Brett still my boss, I have to be careful. I can’t risk losing this job before I sell my house, no matter how badly I want to get away from him.
His hand tightens around my arm. “I know I fucked up, but we’re endgame, baby. Blake and Brett. I’m not going to lose you.”
I try to pull away from him, but he tugs me closer, his grip on the edge of being painful.
“I’ll do whatever it takes to get you back.”
“Let go of me, please.”
His jaw firms, his expression flashing with displeasure. I’ve managed to annoy him. He’s used to me being an easier mark.
When he doesn’t remove his hand, I wring my arm away and head straight to the back.